I absolutely hate having premenstrual syndrome.
It’s something that I struggle with and it brings out the bipolar in me, a lot of bad vibes and the worst part is that me & Papple get really tense, irritable and end up fighting. Other than the annoying and painful physical symptoms, my mood swings become terrible, I experience feelings of stress, tension, anxiety and some panic attacks, I become more sensitive, irritable, anhedonic and an annoying problem of losing my ability to focus. I get particularly restless and it seems like my body and limbs have a mind of their own and I almost always tend to imagine flinging myself into a wall, crashing on the floor and get really exhausted. I feel like a whirlpool of emotional turmoil, overwhelming anxiety and a ridiculous low amount of self-esteem (as if my self-esteem was that high in the first place -___-). Like last night I felt particularly irritated which eventually made me feel invisible, really crappy that I shut down. It probably seems silly and I probably over reacted a little over something that I was annoyed with and rather let it pass me but noooo~ It felt stifling and I felt injured and …hurt. And I get really crappy whenever I try to express things at this point.
“Let’s just be bananas again ♥”
Papple, you’re the best and I love you. ♥
I just don’t like myself very much whenever I turn into some emotional wreck.